1-888-for-kfire

October 27, 2003 &bull uncategorized

“Once again ladies and gentlemen, the number is 1-888-FOR-KFIRE. You’re our eyes and ears so give us a call and let us know what’s going on out there. 1-888-FOR-KFIRE. If you’ve been out of the loop today and don’t know what’s going on, we have major wildfires burning all over San Diego County. Let’s go to the phones. Oliver, you’re on the air.”

“Hello”

“Yes, hello, you’re on the air.”

“Hello?”

“Oliver, you’re on the air.”

“Yes. I’m on Southbound I-15 and it is backed up for miles.”

“Great information Oliver! Thanks for the call. Remember folks, you’re our eyes and ears. Give us a call and let us know what you see. 1-888-FOR-KFIRE. Hello, Kay, you’re on the air. What do you see?”

“Well, nothing ’cause I’m in the laundry room and we don’t have any windows in here. Anyway, I saw flames in my backyard a few minutes ago and I’m not sure [cough] if we need to evacuate. Have you heard anything?”

“What community are you in Kay?”

“Poway”

“I’m sorry, but we don’t have any information about Poway at the moment. We’ll get in touch with the Forestry Service and fire departments, though, and will get that on the air. Stay tuned and we’ll get that on for you. Thanks for the call.”

“OK. [cough, cough]”

Next caller. Ester, you’re on KFIRE. What do you see?”

“Yes. Thank you. I remember in the fire of ’73 we saw all sorts of tragedies; the fires were swarming all over in the backwoods areas. In fact,–”

“Next caller. (Let’s keep it relevant, folks.) Now we’ve got John Raybarns, spokesperson for Acme utility. John, how’s it looking out there.”

“Well, we’ve seen better days, but for the most part we’re hanging in there.”

“Great. What message do you have for us?”

“I just wanted to let all Acme employees know that only essential personnel should report to work tomorrow. All non-essential personnel should stay home and off the freeways.”

“Great message, John. Thanks for the information. OK, onto–”

“Actually, this whole non-essential personnel thing really helps us out. Heh, heh, we’ve got a big layoff coming up and this helps us determine the poor S.O.B.s that are gonna get sacked! You stay home, obviously your not essential to the operation so you get the boot! Heh, heh.”

“Um, John, your mic’s still live. Uh, anyway, back to the phones. Remember folks, you’re our eyes and ears out there….”

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